2 months

We've hit the 2 month mark today. Here are the facts:

weight: 14 1/2 lbs, give or take

height: 23 1/2 inches

likes: sleeping, sleeping some more, letting his mom sleep until 5am or later, eating ravenously, looking at toys on bouncy seat, watching his big sister, kisses, eating his blanket or just falling asleep during tummy time, being carried in the moby wrap, taking his binky for approximately 20 seconds at nap time

dislikes: the carseat (still), the stroller because he's also in his carseat there, baths in the bathroom sink, his dad's sneezes, not being in his bed when he's tired

check out those thighs!

Yes, he's smiling as he's falling over

Summer Days

Summer has passed me by this year, which will be really sad come the months and months of cold we have ahead of us. I decided it was about time to do something about this. We took a walk in the morning sunshine today, and splashed in the kiddie pool this afternoon after naps. I love the dry heat out here. I love our little fenced in backyard, so I don't have to worry when my daughter randomly decides to remove her swimming suit.

This was my first day off of work since Benson was born. We have a student in the office completing her clinical hours in a doctor's office for her medical coding degree, so she will be Scott's assistant for the next few days. I'm heading out of town on Friday to see my parents, and more importantly, my little brother who returns home from his mission today.

This is also my first real day of parenting two children myself. I know, I'm a lucky girl. Scott's been home with me for the most part when we aren't at work until this week. He's getting back to his roots, working for his dad in the wheat harvest. He'll be in the fields whenever he's not at his regular job for the next week or two. I sure am proud of him for working so hard.

Benson is now the same age Madeline was the first time I took her home to meet my family and friends. That's significant because I remember a lot about that trip and about Madeline at that time. She was chubby just like Benson is, but she didn't weigh quite as much. I remember how sweet and relaxed she was at that age. She was smiling, but didn't give them as freely as her brother. And she was cute as a button! Here are some thoughts I've had this week about Benson:

When I was pregnant with him, I used to say that I only had one request for the child I was carrying. The request was that he please, please be a child that will sleep. Madeline hates to sleep and really always has. She doesn't want to miss out on anything that might be going on while she's asleep. When Benson was born, he slept a lot during the day, but he'd be up most of the night. My hopes for a good sleeper were dashed and I had visions of being up all night for years to come. It turned out he just had his days and nights majorly mixed up. My saving grace was a swing my brother lent us that I would put him in at night so I didn't have to be up rocking the baby for hours. Now he sleeps great. At this age, Madeline would only sleep about three hours out of the day. Benson is only awake for about three hours a day. Seriously. The kid sleeps ALL the time. He only gets up once to eat at night after a good 6 hour stretch of sleep. It's a miracle. Request granted.

Motherhood has come so much easier this time around. And, this might not sound very good, but truthfully my love for him has come much easier. Before I had Madeline I would imagine her birth like I had seen on tv, with the mother brought to tears the first time she saw her newborn child. It didn't go down like that at all with Madeline. There were no tears; there was no overwhelming feeling of love. My hormones were really crazy, and all I felt at first was indifference. She was a stranger to me, and I had to grow to love her. And I did, but it took a little time. It has been different this time around. My hormones weren't nearly as crazy, and I've felt immense love for him from the very beginning.

He is growing so much everyday. He doesn't look like a newborn to me anymore. He also doesn't look like a little Benjamin Button, as my brother called him last time he saw Benson. For a few weeks he was an old man teenage newborn with a receding hairline and acne. He lost a bunch of hair in the front, but it's growing back in and it's still brown. His skin is now soft and kissable.

Benson comes to work with us everyday. He is such a good boy there. I wear him in a Moby wrap most of the time, and he just sleeps. Occasionally it gets tricky to feed him in between patients, but luckily he eats quickly.

He smiles when I nurse him. That's one of my favorite things my kids have done. I love it when they are smiling so much, they can't even eat. The joys of motherhood come in moments. Moments like those.

Lucky

I'm a pretty lucky girl.

Feelings From a Little Girl

These are Madeline's current sentiments about having a baby brother. This was a conversation we had before leaving for the swimming pool yesterday:

Madeline: "Mommy, will you get in the water with me and daddy?"

Me: "No, honey, mommy has to sit with Baby Benson."

Madeline: "Well, you could just leave him in his carseat and come swimming."

Me: "I don't think that's a very good idea. I need to stay right by him. What if someone came and took him while I wasn't looking?"

Madeline: "That would be ok with me if we didn't have a baby in our family anymore. They're too much work!"

I've tried today to involve her more in my "baby work", and that seems to be helping a little. She's always very sweet with Benson, but there are a lot of jealousy issues right now. I really hope she will grow to love him.

One Month

We've come out of the dark ages today, and now have internet access in our new home. It's the first time in a year we've had reliable internet access to our own computer, so blogging should be much easier now.

Our little guy turned one month old last week, and what a month it's been. My postpartum recovery wasn't too bad, but I'd forgotten all that one has to deal with during the first few weeks. What was worse than that was that darned flu that I caught before Benson was born that would not let go and kept me up most of the night coughing. I finally went to the doctor and found that it had morphed into bacterial bronchitis and sinusitis, with perhaps a tad of asthma (an interesting diagnosis to receive at age 29). Even with antibiotics, it's only this week I can actually say I'm all better. I blame Benson. I think he's been taking all of my vitamins and immunities. We also moved into our new home during his first month. No big changes or anything :)

Benson's first month has been a lot different than Madeline's first month. With Madeline, I took three months off of work, with Benson I was lucky to get four days. Really. But a lot has been better, too. He's generally a more laid back baby (until you put him in his carseat), and I've become a more laid back mom, mostly out of necessity. I just don't have the time to watch and analyze his every movement during the day. I haven't cracked open any parenting/sleeping books, and have relied more on his cues as to what he needs. He sleeps better than Madeline did now that he's stopped having hours long middle of the night parties. He actually prefers this week to be placed in his bed instead of rocked to sleep. It's great.

Madeline's adjustment to him was better in the beginning than it is now. That mostly has to do with the fact that grandma and grandpa aren't around to shower her with lots of extra attention. Some days are ok; some are extremely challenging with her.

Benson has grown a ton in the last month and looks more and more like his dad everyday. Due to some health insurance troubles, we haven't taken him to the doctor yet. So, we don't have an official weight, but he sure has some rolls. We weighed him on my in-laws' bathroom scale on Saturday, and he was 12 1/2 pounds! He was clothed and his diaper may or may not have weighed a half pound itself, but he's somewhere around 12 pounds. Scott and I seem to make big babies, and that's how we like 'em.

This baby has brought a special spirit to our home this last month. We just love him to pieces!