Aunt Megan's visit

Madeline's Aunt Megan (my youngest sister) came out to visit us earlier in the summer. It ended up being a really crazy week, and not much went as planned, but I was so grateful to have her help. She was really such a blessing to us at that time. I didn't take any pictures while she was here, but these are a few of the pictures she took.

We went to a baby shower and two birthday parties in one day! Here we are at the park for the last of the parties.

Madeline wanted to be just like her Aunt Megan, purse and all. She would trail behind us out of the house with her arm swinging and carrying her special little purse.

We did a little shopping, which Megan was grateful for because the shopping in Logan is definitely lacking. Madeline spent a good long while playing in the lingerie rack at Gap. There was a lot of crying when I didn't buy that little number she was holding onto.

She got to play with exiting new toys from Megan's purse.

Madeline really took to Megan, and still gets exited when she sees pictures of her. We can't wait to see her again at Christmas, if not before.

Thanks so much for coming to see us, Megan!

18 Months!

Madeline hit the 18 month landmark last week. Here are a few of my thoughts about this time in her life.

Things I love about Madeline right now:

- hearing her nearly constant jibber jabber
-her great big, sometimes slobbery kisses with a loud SMACK at the end
-her cute teeth that make her look like a little girl instead of a baby
-that she wipes up after her own spills
-that she throws her trash away in the garbage can
-that she is sleeping through the night, again
-how she runs so adorably with her little head forward
-how she still sleeps on her haunches (as Scott puts it)
-how she calls me "mimi"

Things Madeline loves:

-reading stories, sometimes the same one over and over again
-watching Elmo "Ngo Ngo" while I shower
-bubbles in the tub, and washing herself
-any and all fruits, and not much else
-carrying around a bag of grapes and a bagel first thing in the morning, before breakfast
-being carried or "worn" by her mom
-bows and flip flops
-swimming
-standing in the fridge with the door wide open, just looking
-her blanket and giraffe
-snuggling up with her mom while still in her towel after a bath

Moments

I have found that motherhood involves a degree of monotony and drudgery. But, there are wonderful moments of pure joy that shine throught the long days. Tonight I had one of those such moments. Madeline was sitting on my lap in our rocking chair after her bath, as naked as the day she was born. We were singing "I'm bringing home a baby bumblebee". She was bouncing up and down with her hands clasped together, saying "baby bee, baby bee" with a huge smile on her face. I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude and happiness for the chance to be the mother of such an amazing, beautiful little girl. There is nothing in this world I would rather be.

I've loved watching Madeline meet the milestones of childhood, but I think my favorite milestone has been her talking. I get so exited and proud every time she learns how to say a new word. It seems like its happening every day now, and it's so amazing. I love to hear how she pronunciates her words. Often times it's practically undecipherable, but so cute. My favorite word of hers right now is "dirty". She says, "dirtally" with a little flip of the tongue. However, her current favorite word is "no".

This is a typical conversation in our home:

Me: Madeline, lets go change your diaper.

Madeline: Noooooo!

Me: Yes, we need to.

Madeline: No.

Me: Yes, Madeline, it's dirty!

Madeline: No.

Me: Can you please learn how to say yes?

Madeline: No.

Letter to the Insomniac

Dear Madeline,

Will you please, please sleep? I know you were really sick two weeks ago and haven't been able to sleep well since. Then Daddy called me on Friday night when I was at work and put the phone up to you. Your breathing sounded HORRENDOUS! I told him take you in the bathroom and steam it up with the hot shower and beat on your back to get you to cough. It helped a little bit, but you still sounded like your throat was really swollen. I know I told Daddy to put you in bed with him so he could hear you and check on you easily. Maybe that wasn't the right decision, but I was afraid you might die, as I have found is a common (but usually crazy) fear of motherhood. Then the next day you didn't want to nap in your crib. But, you were sick and really tired, and I was really tired, so I gave in and let you nap with me in bed. So the pattern continued for the next couple of days.

Last night you weren't sick anymore. Daddy and I wanted you to sleep in your crib, just like you've been doing for months. Was it really necessary for you to cry in protest for so long? It made me feel so sad to hear you. I worried that something might be wrong. I worried that I'm not a good mother to you. How come you had to then wake up at 4:45 in the morning and cry some more? I checked on you when you first started crying, but you were fine. You just wanted me to hold you. I love to hold you, but not every night in the middle of the night for hours until you fall back asleep. That makes me really tired and really grumpy in the morning.

Usually when people are tired, they sleep. I have found that this is not the case with you. Maybe you could learn, though.

I love you so much, but could you please, please sleep?

Love,
Your mom